I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
