so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
