Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
