She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
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