When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
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