im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
