We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
