For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize