I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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