Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
