have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
