I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
They are going to name an STD after you.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
