rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Randomize
