Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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