is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
