I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
