How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
