Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
