Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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