He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
wow bdsm is so cute
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