I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
