just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
