Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
