I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
