Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
