"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
