Me too!
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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