But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
