haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Randomize
