Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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