thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Randomize
