just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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