do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
