You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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