i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
