The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize