Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
