its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
