So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
