I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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