As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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