I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize
