I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
