i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
