You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
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