Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
