I skipped work to stalk him.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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