Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize