ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
