We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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